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Choosing to stay sober » Blogging AS an Aspie
Matt has Asperger’s Syndrome (AS), an Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and is writing this blog so that people can gain more of an insight into how people with the condition process thoughts, feel emotions, react to situations and generally handle life.

20 Oct 08 Choosing to stay sober

I was at an 18th birthday party on Saturday night, and surprised both myself and everybody who knows me by staying sober for the whole night. But why did I choose to do so?

A few reasons, some background, but one main one. Firstly, I worked an outdoor bank holiday event in August, where alcohol was flowing freely; and despite working and not drinking any of it; I really had a good time. At this event, I also learnt a lot about what can go wrong, and how stupid people really can be when it comes to consuming alcohol.

Secondly, the last 18th birthday party I went to didn’t quite go very well, and I almost ended up in serious trouble. Oops. I thought it might be best not to end up making the same mistakes. You know, as in ‘let’s prove I can actually be responsible’ type of thinking!

But the main reason had more to do with whose party I was at. You see, I have a tremendous amount of respect for my friend, and I also like her, as in really like her. Therefore, I didn’t want to put myself in the position where I’d do something stupid that I’d regret around her. I don’t know why, but she is the one girl who I really like, but somehow always seem to get things right whenever I’m with her.

For some reason, I seem to change my personality, and the flirtiness calms down. Weird, I know, especially considering that she’s currently single! I never think of doing anything other than hugging her, or simply being with her. Which unfortunately means I wasn’t quite expecting her reaction when she saw the necklace I bought her; she came at me, I expected her to hug me, and she tried to kiss me. Oops. Not the usual me – if it wasn’t her, I’d have most likely been the one initiating the kiss…

Also at this party, was her ex-boyfriend, who she’s said she does not ever want to go back out with, “too many times” being her favoured saying! Firstly, I figured my friend would be getting rather drunk and might just appreciate waking up and not regretting anything. Secondly, I’d had one conversation with him before, and didn’t want a similar one if I was drunk, I doubt if I could handle it well.

So, I stayed sober. Apart from her younger brother, I was the only sober person at the party. And it’s a good thing I’m a first aider, because 2 people passed out with drink, and 3 more were vomiting. Lovely. It does make me wonder why people let themselves get into that kind of state. I was also able to help my friend when she wanted 5 minutes alone in her room and her other friends were thinking it was best to sit with her. One simple, but semi-polite request later, my friend had the space she was asking for.

I really enjoyed the night, and thank my friend for inviting me. For once, I can walk away in the knowledge that I hadn’t done anything wrong at all!

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